Sci-Fi Channel Premiere: Alien Apocalypse Review

If you're about to embark on filming what you simply have to know is going to be an awful movie, you can do a few things right. It should be campy, it should be littered with horrid special effects, and if you really know what you're doing, you get Bruce Campbell. That's about the only saving grace to "Alien Apocalypse," a movie that at least tried a little bit to be entertaining unlike some of the other dredge Sci-Fi has cooked up recently.

Four astronauts return to Earth after a 40-year long voyage. They land on the planet to find it decimated and now taken over by aliens. The aliens have come to Earth to collect wood, which they then sell to their home planet as it is treated like gold. Humans are enslaved to harvest it, but the returning astronaut Dr. Ivan Wood (Campbell) isn't about to put up with it. With a rag-tag group of people, he begins a fight to reclaim the planet by force and hopefully restore the human way.

At the very least, the movie knows just how bad it is. There's not a single moment where things are to be seriously. There are a plethora of running jokes and the aliens are the prototypical "little green men." Just because it treats it all like camp doesn't exactly mean you'll have a good time however.

Alongside Bruce Campbell is Renee O'Connor of "Xena" fame. The director here is Josh Becker who directed an episode of the cult classic TV show and did some sound work on "The Evil Dead." It seems like all Becker wanted to do is reunite himself with a couple of actors and throw them in the most slap dash movie possible (he even uses a few Sam Raimi style quick-cuts just because he could apparently).

It's relatively obvious just how pathetic this is all is. Ignoring the special effects for a moment (which is, admittedly, hard to do), you have to wonder just how an alien race like this could have taken over the world. Taken down by nothing more than an arrow, these green cricket-looking things (called mites) go down quick. Worse, during multiple onslaughts, the aliens just stand there looking at each other while arrows zip by, knocking over dead their friends as they watch. They never make a single attempt to move or get out of the way.

Those special effects are a mixture of really, really shoddy puppets and even worse CGI. The alien design is obviously a cheap homage to the 50's sci-fi fare, though still ridiculous. They never once seem menacing, even when they bite a few heads off (complete with way overdone blood squirt).

There is a small possibility this could be enjoyable for you. It does have some incredibly corny dialogue delivered with all the style Campbell usually does, those running jokes can be funny, and it's all so flat out stupid it may just hook if you're into the whole "Mystery Science Theater" scene. Other then those few reasons, there's no reason to park yourself in front of the screen for two whole hours. Surely you have better things to do, right?

Comments (2)

zzz:

horrible movie - the worst ripoff ive seen. there is no need to diss bruce campbell just to make your review sound better :/

I'm not seeing where I dissed Campbell anywhere. In fact, he was the sole reason to watch this one.

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