Dead or Alive Teaser Trailer

Wow this looks like a winner. If you think you recognize Kasumi it's because you do, she is Devon Aoki (Sin City). The movie doesn't really have anyone else famous in it. But then who wants to be in a movie about a video game notorious for its bouncing boobies.

This looks like Charlie's Angels meets Kill Bill. Seriously, why does every video game franchise have to have a movie these days? Didn't they learn the lesson with Super Mario Bros.? I could go on an on with examples here but I won't. OK, just one: BloodRayne, directed by out favorite video game movie director (sarcasm).

Please stop making tacky, horrible video game-based movies. Like Doom, another shining example. Having The Rock say "Game On" is not the way to introduce the masses to the Doom universe. No wonder video games get such a bad rap.

In related news: Uwe Boll is rumored to be directing a Metal Gear movie.

Nooooooooooo!

I can see it now, they will get Kurt Russell to play Snake (Plissken) again (Escape from L.A.) and then we can turn the game's cultural reference on its head. Yea, that would be great! Never mind that David Hayter should be the obvious choice for the screen adaptation.

But lets get back to this Dead or Alive teaser trailer. If you have ever followed the bizarre story lines in Story Mode (yes there are actually story lines in the game - shocking, I know) you would be hoping beyond hope that the writers for this movie come up with something original.

The bamboo forest scene in the trailer is directly ripped from House of Flying Daggers, and the wire-foo is also clearly a derivative of both House of Flying Daggers and Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. In short: there does not seem to be an ounce of originality in this Dead or Alive movie. Not that I'm shocked. Just saddened.

What's next? Ninja Gaiden The Movie?

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