Hitman (The Movie) Review

Although it is not getting drug through the mud by press, the movie was a disapointment. Jordan and I went to see it before Thanksgiving, and we should have seen Beowulf.

In the video game series, Agent 47 is a clone, all the assassins are clones. In the movie, they are just orphans raised to be silent assassins. So the fact that they have bar codes tatood to the back of theirs heads makes no sense in the movie. They have bar codes in the game because they are clones.

The movie has many plot threads, a couple of which are just plain confusing, and the hooker plot thread is entirely uneeded. Why does 47 need her again? One plot line, maybe more, were not fully resolved, but I am not about to see it again to try and figure it out.

The movie has a heck of a lot of action. The action is not bad. But this is a movie based on a video game called Hitman, not Blow Shit Up All The Time. Its the same thing as if they made a movie and called it Splinter Cell or Metal Gear Solid and in realiity it was just Die Hard 4 with the title of Splinter Cell.

Agent 47 makes stealth kills, that is his job, and that is how he gets paid. Hells bells, the second game is even called Silent Assassin.

While Dougray Scott played a believable role, Timothy Olyphant is not a cold hearted killer. He looks like a big ole' teady bear with his head shaved. He worked in Die Hard 4 quite well, not in Hitman, though.

The movie has a funny sex scene. Nika gets on top of 47 and tries to seduce him into having sex. Having no social skills whatsover, he plants a syringe in the topless womans neck, nocking her out.

Another funny bit, as 47 breaks through a hotel window running away from the Russian police, two kids are playing Hitman: Blood Money. It is a split second clip, but you see the iconic back of 47's head (in the video game).

The movie had decent action, a couple scenes with tits, and some rye humor, but it was not a Hitman movie.

It is worth seeing at the matenee price.

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